by Larissa Westhuyzen
"If we are faithless, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Himself." - 2 Timothy 2:13
“Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation” – Psalm 68:5
“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” – Psalm 56:8
“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death' or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." – Revelation 21:4
This year I have experienced all kinds of heart-break. I have experienced deep sorrow over broken relationships in my own life, felt the pangs of unfaithfulness, and seen my own sin and inadequacy with painful clarity. I have experienced anguish over the cruel, selfish and manipulative behaviour of people who should be the protectors of their victims. I have watched the heart-wrenching effects of husbands who have cheated on their wives and the ripples of ongoing pain of navigating the broken family life. And on and on I could go. But, by His grace, the Holy Spirit has been using these heart-breaks to deepen my love for Christ.
For many years I have held a deep trust in God’s ultimate wielding of good through the heart-breaking seasons of life. This has been a gift that has held me through those times. But this year, Jesus has been drawing me into deeper intimacy with Him by using those times of grief to show me that He is the antithesis to the very thing that is anguishing my soul at any given moment. When my heart is pierced by the unfaithfulness of others, I am compelled to treasure and trust His unswerving faithfulness all the more. My love for Him increases as I consider His dependable safety and trustworthiness in contrast to the precariousness of even the strongest of human relationships.
My heart aches as I see the deep wounds so frequently inflicted by an ex-lover on a dear friend. But my heart is comforted as I consider the gentleness and kindness of Jesus. The one who will never leave or forsake. I cherish His never-failing love, His selflessness with much more personal consequence. When I realise my own sinfulness in assuming the role of the Holy Spirit in someone’s life to change them, but failing miserably, I love Jesus more because I know that He is all-knowing, has perfect judgement and has the power to change hearts.
Furthermore, He is not only the shining contrast to the painful evil in this world, but He is bringing it all to an end. Reflecting on the pain that this year has brought to so many, it is difficult not to become overwhelmed with grief and sorrow. But my heart is lifted when I remember that one day soon, Jesus is going to come back. He will wipe every tear from our eyes, ones he has counted and stored in jars. He will judge the evil in this world with perfect judgement. Nothing will escape His vision. And He will wipe away all sin, sorrow, evil, and death. He will consummate the victory won on that cross and one day we will live with Him in a world that is ruled by the One who is all-loving, all-kind, all-gracious, perfectly good, abundantly generous, wisest of wise, creator of beauty, and giver of joy, life, fun, adventure, and intimacy. We will live life to the full with Him, free from the pangs of the brokenness we currently experience every day. What a friend we have in Jesus! All our sins and griefs to bear.
Larissa Westhuyzen works part time as an Occupational Therapist in chronic pain management, and is the wife of Pastor Mike Westhuyzen of Enoggera Baptist Church. She has a passion for painting, worship and deep discipleship, and loves to spend her free time in the garden. She lives in Warner and is mum to two little girls - Lucy and Violet.
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